EDIT: is my begining of book good? Critiques?

Well Im not going to harp on the grammer as you didnt ask about that... TO amny grammer queens out there as it is... BUT you still wont like what i have to say... One If this is a true castle How in the world can a King or Prince hear anything that is happening at the front door from his room in bed unless the castle is tiny in the extreme??? I might suggest you change the name from Williamsburg which sort of means willaims city to Williamson which is the old norse son of william etc... its sounds better as well.. also that being his first name would be odd and just doesnt fit.... Now you assert he has taken conrtoll of the kingdom which makes him king why would he put up with a doorman that is so impertanant? firing him if not jailing him would be in order if the new king let a doorman be such a way where is his respect at all?.....